The Culture: Palembang
Text by Leyla Fauwzya
I
nfluenced by Javanese and Chinese culture, weddings in Palembang, the capital of Indonesia’s South Sumatran province, are a unique celebration not to be missed. From the proposal all the way through the wedding itself, each rite and ritual is steeped in tradition and symbolism handed down through the ages, a kind of guide from the ancestors for the bride and groom before they begin their journey into marital bliss.
Gold is the dominant colour at Palembang weddings, reflecting the triumph of the great Sriwijaya dynasty that held sway over much of Southeast Asia from the 7th to 13th centuries. There are two types of attire for a Palembang wedding: Aesan Gede and Aesan Pak Sangko. The royal princes and princesses of the Sriwijaya dynasty wore Aesan Gede, while Aesan Pak Sangko was worn by commoners. While intended for different social classes, both possess a grand glamour with elegant headpieces and gorgeous details.
The Procession in a Palembang Wedding:
Madik
Before a marriage proposal takes place, the parents of the groom send messengers, usually a married couple from the family, to make the initial approach and get to know the family of the bride. As a show of goodwill, the messengers bring tenong, a kind of food basket with eggs, sugar, cakes and other goodies. On this occasion, the messengers raise the possibility of a marriage proposal to the parents of the intended bride.
Menyenggung
This is when the families discuss the upcoming marriage proposal. The parents of the groom send five married couples from the family to discuss the matter. They bring eggs, sugar, milk and wajik, a sweet and sticky glutinous rice cake, for the family of the bride-to-be. Wajik symbolises the two families sticking closer together.
Mutus Kato
With decisions made and the proposal done, the bride-to-be is “tied” or “taken” for the upcoming marriage. Usually a ring exchange ceremony takes place to make the engagement official. Both families finally meet to discuss when the wedding will take place, what the family of the bride wants, what the family of the groom has to offer and all the details of the ceremony. Relatives of the groom bring gifts like clothes, traditional songket cloth, dodol, a sweet delicacy, bananas as a symbol of prosperity and other fruits.
Serah-Serahan Gegawan
As a token of love, the groom sends gifts to the bride-to-be, usually a month before the wedding day. The gifts consist of:
- Uang asap, or the money needed by the bride for the wedding
- Kepala adat, which is songket and lace, in an odd number
Akad Nikah
The wedding ceremony is held at the groom’s residence, without the presence of the bride, who is represented by a wali. A wali is an appointed representative of the bride according to Islamic law. It can be her biological father, brother or legal religious official.
Munggah
Munggah is the height of celebration in a Palembang wedding. After the ceremony, the groom and his entourage march to the bride’s residence, accompanied by traditional martial art pencak silat and dance performances. Before entering the house, the groom is greeted with a shower of rice, jasmine flowers, sweets and coins as a symbol of prosperity. The groom then prostrates himself before the parents of the bride as a show of respect then enters the bride’s room.
Buka Lawang Buka Langse
When he enters the bride’s room, the groom brings a langse, a small vase filled with a few flowers as a symbol that happiness is here to stay.
Sirih Penyapo
The newlyweds are then united in a precise ceremony that is much like a choreographed dance:
- The groom opens the veil worn by the bride
- The bride prostrate herself before her new husband as a show of respect
- The groom steps on the bride’s right big toe and touches her on the forehead while praying in a step known as batal wudhu, or breaking the state of purity
- The bride and the groom are then guided through the sirih penyapo ceremony, when the groom feeds betel leaves to his bride
Nyacapi
The newlyweds are escorted outside the room for nyacapi, performed by their parents, who feed the bride and the groom by hand as a sign of affection. After being fed, the bride and groom are sprinkled with flower water.
Timbang Pengantin
This ritual symbolises maintaining the balance between families, now that the children are out of the house. Using an old scale, a Koran is placed on one end while the bride and groom place their rights hands on the other end. Hopes and prayers are given to the newlyweds for a long and happy marriage. The ceremony ends with the bride performing the ritual pagar pengantin dance, signifying the bride’s transition from being single to becoming a married woman.
After the Wedding
To strengthen the relationship between families, there are some after-wedding rituals for the newlyweds to perform:
Pengantin Balik
On the appointed day, the newlyweds return to the groom’s house, escorted by a group of people bringing household appliances.
Mandi Simburan
This symbolises the cleansing of husband and wife who have already had intercourse. Starting off with a prayer, each parent then applies liquid rice powder to the foreheads, shoulders, necks and arms of the newlyweds, before showering them from head to toe with water. Ending the ritual, the water is splashed on family members and friends attending the ritual.
.